Wednesday, June 13, 2018

I’ve Gotten Used to It



I’ve Gotten Used to It

            it’s
true
I have
gotten used to it
the blatant absence
& chaos of starlight
            it’s
            true
            I have
been interned by
a radiant seraph &
I have touched his
hands
            during an
un-hoped for eventide
a light wind rummaged
our union
            it’s
            true
            I have
gotten used to it
vanished arms & legs
the tearing out of my
heart
            I
wash
each                
            evening
with invisible water
to
fill
the
void
until
I can
find him
somewhere
else
some
other
day

***

The title of this poem is intentionally misleading for poetry’s sake. I will never be used to being without my Dad.

Ain't gonna lie, the barrage of Father's Day displays, sales, and mentions this time around is tightening it's grip around my lonely heart. I try and not let it get me, I really do. I face holidays, especially the ones that celebrate him, with fondness and love and I always try and partake in an activity or have a meal he'd enjoy. I haven't quite formulated a plan for Sunday as yet but I do have one teeny idea to incorporate. I just need a trinket and it'll all come together.

If you’re lucky enough to still have yours, be kind to him. Love him and tell him so. And, more importantly, if you've fallen out with your Pa, consider forgiveness. It's a superpower we all employ.

In propinquity,
Nic



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